yoga and meditation

One of my goals for 2010 was to increase my own practice at home. I have created a little space in my home to do this. Mike actually had the idea of the particular room (very sweet). We moved my office out of the back room and into the front sun room. The spare bedroom is now becoming the quiet room when no one is visiting. It is difficult to put away ALL clutter but it is much better than it was. I put some wedding pictures in there, as well as some lavender essential oil, a beautiful rug, a small water fountain and some curtains. I unplugged the annoying and bright red-numbered alarm clock and put it away. I have my yoga mat and blocks, meditation cushion, meditation cd's, and meditation music.

Now that I have this special space, I have more motivation to spend some time doing yoga or meditation. I am also hoping that I am building some positive, healing energy in my new room. I remember so clearly walking into the room Mo created as her first quiet room, years ago. The energy was so powerful and wonderful. I can't even really explain it but to say that as soon as you entered, you felt this amazing and powerful energy. I hope some of you can visit my room someday and share some healing energy.

I wanted to share one pose I have learned and added to my practice. This is a simple restorative pose I learned in yoga class and have seen on many blogs, it involves putting your legs up on the wall. I have read it is actually great to do in the evening as a way to quiet down and get ready for sleep. I have been trying to do it for a few minutes at night. I haven't graduated to a nightly practice, but it helps to sit with my legs up on a wall a few nights a week.

Have a nice sleep.

(Photo by Bill Masciarelli at Wild Dunes, Oct. 2009)

to health

I haven't used this space to talk about cancer much. I started this blog way before cancer (BC) and I enjoy it as a place to share exciting life events and thoughts. My friend Rebecca created a wonderful blog last year, when I was first diagnosed and I have been keeping it updated with my progress.

I think I like it separate but just figured I would show the link to my health updates.

for 2010

I made a lot of changes in my diet and lifestyle in 2009. I would say 99-100% were based on my cancer diagnosis. Very soon after being diagnosed, I read a ton of books (most of the quality "kick cancer butt" books were sent from a great friend and colleague of mine - thanks Doug!)and learned about the things I could do besides take horrible pills to fight cancer. I changed my diet greatly, eliminated toxins, threw away all of my white flour and perfume for good, joined a support group, started jumping on a mini trampoline, found a yoga class just for women with cancer, and embraced the whole idea that you have to enjoy life today/live in the moment/be happy for what is now, etc.

While all VERY positive, these changes were made from a place that did include a tiny bit of fear. I was scared in 2009 and needed to figure out everything I could possibly do to fight. I am excited to start 2010, to continue with the changes I made last year while embracing my new life and feeling a bit less fear. I made some goals for this year. Yes, many are still based on the fact that I have cancer, but I think they come from a different place within me. I am excited to continue my healthy eating, find new ways to eliminate more toxins, continue my quest towards mindfulness, and seek out more fun as I enjoy marriage, friends, and family!

A few things I would like to do in 2010:

- Cook dry beans and freeze some to be ready for another meal. They taste SO much better. Thanks, Jessie, for that idea.
- Sunday meal planning for the week including lunch
- Broadway show with hubby
- Berkeley and other trips including somewhere hot and beach-y with mike
- Knit for the new babies coming into my life this year (and remember to bring the knitting for the waiting rooms - 1 reason I wanted to learn how to knit was so I could fill up some time spent in waiting rooms by knitting)
- Finish the quiet room for meditation, yoga, journaling, or just sitting with a book
-Deepen my yoga and meditation practice
- Give myself some thinking time on my dissertation
- Tone down the internet use in the evenings (half the time I am searching mindlessly at things I don't really even care about!!)

my garden buddy

On New Year's eve, I heard the news that my friend's dog passed on suddenly. He was about 12 years old. Mylo was a wonderful dog and had a lovely, exciting life following my friend to wherever life took them. I lived with Mylo for many years and he was a very good garden buddy. I had a garden a few blocks from where we lived and we would walk there together. I would work and Mylo would find a shady spot to nap. Sometimes, he sun bathed and once he ran out into the corn field and caught a baby rabbit. Luckily, he knows the word "Drop" and did so quickly when I realized what he was about to bring over to my plot of organic vegetables. Another day, he decided he was ready to go home and while I was busy digging, he walked home. When I noticed he wasn't under the tree, a search ensued for quite awhile before we realized he simply went home. (For those who knew him, you would understand the surprise at his decision to do his own thing.) Mylo loved harvest times, especially when it allowed him to chomp on fresh snap peas.

My very first blog post featured Mylo, sitting very close to me as I studied.

I am very sad for my friend's loss. I will hold memories of his very good company close to me.

the end of 2009

Well, December flew right by me. It was a wonderful holiday season, celebrating for nearly 3 weeks. We covered a lot of family ground. It was lovely to space out the celebrating; much less time rushing from here to there. Christmas brought us to RI a few times, New Orleans, Baton Rouge, and Monroe, Louisiana. We owe a visit to Northampton next/immediately.

Just past the new year, I am reflecting on 2009. It has been a wild ride this past year and we have had so much love and support from our family and friends. And here I am, after 1 year of treatment, 1 year older, and feeling mostly healthy and positive and watching the cancer slowly but surely fade away.

I am ready for 2010.

October = South Carolina and DC

I was lucky enough to get away for a few days of healing. I attended a yoga retreat in South Carolina, for breast cancer survivors. We were right on the ocean, stayed in fancy villas, ate yummy foods, and did SO much yoga and meditation. It was wonderful and healing and empowering.

It was strange, the day I traveled there, I was ok, but maybe a little nervous. I have never felt nervous about traveling by myself before breast cancer (enjoy it, in fact), but I was nervous this time. After a few hours of traveling (not bad at all), I arrived at the main building where the yoga and eating would take place with my bags. I met several other women and the lead yoga teacher came up to me and gave me a welcome hug. She must have seen something on my face, because I had never met her before but she felt inclined to hug. Immediately, I became emotional and had tears running out of me. I guess it was just this feeling, this relief of, "yes, I can still do it. I am still me." David Byrne says "Nothing has changed but nothing's the same" - I mean, that is exactly it. It may be cheesy to quote a song, but that is what I felt. It is the same old me, but so much is not the same. After a few moments of tears, I went and put on yoga pants and felt wonderful and powerful and good for 3 days.

After missing my hubby, I got home for a week and then Mike and I went to DC for a few days. One day was for my work but first, we had 2 days of fun. We spent a lot of time looking at art. The National Building Museum had a great exhibit on the original planning of DC. I found some landscape pieces from the 17-18th century very intriguing at the National Gallery of Art. The highlight was the Phillips Collection. Besides looking at a huge Renoir that I had never seen in real life before, we were amazed by the Migration Series by Jacob Lawrence. You can learn more in this interactive site about this series. I had just finished teaching about the Great MIgration in my history of social welfare policy class!



this painting is 2nd Beach Newport in 1878!


this just makes me think "Run Forest, RUN!" I can't help it.


Mike did more exploring while I was in a one-day meeting and took some of these beautiful photos.






October was a beautiful month.

autumn treasures

I do love the summer. I love being near the ocean, being in the garden, and planning day trips that involve outdoor activities. It is great to have long days, lots of vitamin d, and bbq invitations.

Nothing beats the beginning of fall, though. Autumn smells wonderful and cozy. I love needing a sweater and a blanket. I love pumpkins and mums and apple crisp and hot cider. It really is my favorite season. I even like when it starts getting a little darker out earlier and you feel cozy warm inside. The farmers' markets are lush with bounty and filled with people in fleece coats and smiles. I guess it is a little bit of nesting that happens to me at this time of year. It is nostalgic, maybe.

I just realized I wrote a similar 'i heart fall' post last year. It was a lovely time to be wedding planning last year. Mike and I looked at wedding pictures this past weekend.

I celebrated the beginning of this autumn season with Laura. We made our own Rosh Hashanah meal to ring in the new year (sweets for a sweet new year!) We cooked a lot of farmers' market vegetables and I re-learned how to knit. Pumpkins and squash, and well, homemade ice cream can be for any season! I am going to try to enjoy every day of this fall season...